Castaway MMA v2.0

Blows my mind that there are people who have never hand ranch dressing before 😂
Ranch is one of those purely American (well American/Mexican) things. Like spray cheese and the philly cheesesteak. Or the chimichanga, or prickly pears, or lobster/crab rolls. Or crawfish etoufay or bananas foster.

So many tourists don't realize how diverse American cuisine can be. I spent a week in Nawlins and ate like a Bourbon noble.
 
Ranch is one of those purely American (well American/Mexican) things. Like spray cheese and the philly cheesesteak. Or the chimichanga, or prickly pears, or lobster/crab rolls. Or crawfish etoufay or bananas foster.

So many tourists don't realize how diverse American cuisine can be. I spent a week in Nawlins and ate like a Bourbon noble.
You're making me hungry.

That's it, headed to the store for jambalaya ingredients. Hopefully the cute cashier is working.

Be back in a bit.
 
You're making me hungry.

That's it, headed to the store for jambalaya ingredients. Hopefully the cute cashier is working.

Be back in a bit.
Hell yeah.

When my wife and I visited New Orleans, we rented a car to see the plantation houses along the way to Baton Rouge. Stopped by Vacherie, Louisiana (if you ever watched True Detective season 1, that's the place where Woody Harrelson and McConaughey stopped their car by an oil refinery and watched a flock of birds during the sunset). They had a small BBQ spot over there, and it was the first week of April, so crawfish season just started. We ordered 50 crawfish boil in their special cajun seasoning, gator nuggets, garlic bread, and catfish jambalaya. One of the best meals of my life. I think about that place sometimes.
 
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Might be a bold statement for our friends from Europe, but while I would admit that Europe makes better chocolate and wine, American cheese is as good if not better than European cheese (not including burrata and the other mozzarella variants). The stuff being made in Wisconsin, Upstate New York, and New England, I would rather have than British or French cheese. And we have a thing called beer cheese, something that Queen Elizabeth actually shopped for whenever she visited the US. Beer cheese with bits of jalapenos and a large pretzel and a glass of dark beer, the best.
 
Just had a funny interaction at Wal-Mart by the house. It's a Neighborhood Market so it's smaller, a quick in and out, and I tend to walk very quickly through stores such as these lest I become too annoyed.

I happen to file in behind a lady and her two teenaged daughters who walk like fkn sloths. It's busy, so I don't have any opportunity to go around them. They happen to be walking in the exact direction I am...all the way across the store. I take the same couple of turns they do until I finally see my target: a 12pk of Angel Soft.

I'm pretty annoyed by the time we're approaching the tp and speed up, closing the distance between me and the family of snails a bit, yet not invading any personal space at all. One girl looks back, then grabs her sister's arm squeaking out, "This guy's following us," right at the same time I'm reaching for the tp. 😂

I look at them and just bust up laughing. The mom turns around, looks at me, looks at her kids asking, "What's going on?" I say, "Oh, your daughters thought I was stalking them instead of getting some shit paper for the house." Walked off laughing my ass off; it was cathartic.
 
The garbage companies in my County of Florida used to do two bulk pick up days a year. Starting at about 7pm the night before, our neighborhood would get inundated with trucks like this looking to pick up some stuff. They stopped doing the bulk days before covid and just said big stuff would count as one can (we are allowed 2, twice a week), so random large items gets thrown out regularly, but we still have 3-4 guys who drive my neighborhood twice a week looking to pick up stuff they can flip on Marketplace. I sold some old furniture to one of them. He stripped it, painted it, and listed it for 5x what he paid me, lol. No clue what he sold it for, but good for him.
They still do that in my town, and same damn shit.

I may or may not have loudly cussed out one of those turds when he was picking through my pile of shit and blocking me from getting in my driveway.

Douchebag saw me looking to turn, looks up, and then just keeps rolling through the pile. Put that shit in park in the middle of the road, hooped out the car and had some choice words.
 
Just had a funny interaction at Wal-Mart by the house. It's a Neighborhood Market so it's smaller, a quick in and out, and I tend to walk very quickly through stores such as these lest I become too annoyed.

I happen to file in behind a lady and her two teenaged daughters who walk like fkn sloths. It's busy, so I don't have any opportunity to go around them. They happen to be walking in the exact direction I am...all the way across the store. I take the same couple of turns they do until I finally see my target: a 12pk of Angel Soft.

I'm pretty annoyed by the time we're approaching the tp and speed up, closing the distance between me and the family of snails a bit, yet not invading any personal space at all. One girl looks back, then grabs her sister's arm squeaking out, "This guy's following us," right at the same time I'm reaching for the tp. 😂

I look at them and just bust up laughing. The mom turns around, looks at me, looks at her kids asking, "What's going on?" I say, "Oh, your daughters thought I was stalking them instead of getting some shit paper for the house." Walked off laughing my ass off; it was cathartic.
I would not have been so nice, good for you.

That's why you're the best of us Tito.
 
I just thought it was funny, really. These were probably 15yr olds, and they are that dumb. They were legitimately alarmed when there was zero cause for it. Now, had any of them responded to what I said...it probably would've escalated from there.
For me it would have escalated when they decided to move slow and and impede my way.

And then to turn around and say that? Boy, I'dve told her she was to fuckkng stupid to bother kidnapping.
 
I hope you randomly run into them everyday for the next week.

And then a week from tomorrow, I hope they come looking for a new sofa. And there you are.

That kind of thing has definitely happened several times. It's always like, "We gonna play pretend and be cool, or what's happening here? Your call."

One lady, that is just an extremely sad piece of shit, came in after we rebranded, and her first words were, "Oh, it's still you!" 😂

Yep, it's still me, and I'm still done dealing with your dumbass so gtfo!

I've seen this bitch at a handful of stores around town raising her voice demanding refunds or to see a manager, ect. She's the type that makes a hobby of it.
 
That kind of thing has definitely happened several times. It's always like, "We gonna play pretend and be cool, or what's happening here? Your call."

One lady, that is just an extremely sad piece of shit, came in after we rebranded, and her first words were, "Oh, it's still you!" 😂

Yep, it's still me, and I'm still done dealing with your dumbass so gtfo!

I've seen this bitch at a handful of stores around town raising her voice demanding refunds or to see a manager, ect. She's the type that makes a hobby of it.
Now I really hope it happens.

And then you kick them out of the store for following YOU around.
 
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