News Thread


Guy playing with what he thought was an empty revolver kills gf. Gets another gun while his friend, who's on the phone with 911 at the time, tries to stop him from killing himself. The friend was not successful....

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CT gets bashed for being a dork comic. But look at him - dudes kept the show going for like 30 years, had a residence in Vegas, and done all the shit most comics will never do. he may be the only comic boomers can see and name besides George Carlin

He's to comedy what Nickelback are to music.

Everyone bashes on them, but... they have been consistently selling out shows for multiple decades and if you actually listen to their catalog... it's not amazing, but it's not terrible or deserving of all the criticism.
 
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Guy playing with what he thought was an empty revolver kills gf. Gets another gun while his friend, who's on the phone with 911 at the time, tries to stop him from killing himself. The friend was not successful....

escalated.gif
Years ago, this happened to my friend's beautiful 19-year-old daughter in Florida. Her knucklehead boyfriend had some trick he apparently liked to pull with a loaded pistol, he'd set it up so he pulled the trigger but the hammer wouldn't fire or some such nonsense, thought it was funny to point at his friends. He pointed the gun at her and it fired, hitting her in the neck and killing her. They threw that guy in prison, gave him 25 years.
 

Guy playing with what he thought was an empty revolver kills gf. Gets another gun while his friend, who's on the phone with 911 at the time, tries to stop him from killing himself. The friend was not successful....

escalated.gif
Typical Fairbanks, amirite @Eranys
 
Years ago, this happened to my friend's beautiful 19-year-old daughter in Florida. Her knucklehead boyfriend had some trick he apparently liked to pull with a loaded pistol, he'd set it up so he pulled the trigger but the hammer wouldn't fire or some such nonsense, thought it was funny to point at his friends. He pointed the gun at her and it fired, hitting her in the neck and killing her. They threw that guy in prison, gave him 25 years.
 

Woman reports adult toys stolen​

Posted Friday, September 18, 2026 4:07 pm
By Cathy Womble
Lake Okeechobee News
OKEECHOBEE — A Okeechobee County deputy was dispatched on a very unusual call regarding a possible theft. When Okeechobee County Sheriff’s Deputy Dalton Pitts arrived at the home on Northeast 12th Lane, he was met by a woman who said her ex stole a bag filled with very personal items.

According to the incident report, she told the deputy the missing items were adult toys and other similar things, including handcuffs, hogties, a whip, feathers, and many other similar items. She estimated the value of the missing items to be approximately $200.


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Based on the nature of the missing items, the deputy suggested the woman contact her ex and ask him to return them. However, the woman asked the deputy if he would call the man for her. Deputy Pitts called the man and was told the woman had already collected her personal items from his home, and he had not seen those particular things.

When the deputy spoke with the woman again, he told her the matter was civil in nature, and she would need to pursue the matter through civil processes.
 
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School bus driver no longer employed and faces criminal charges​

Posted Monday, September 21, 2026 11:27 am
By Cathy Womble
Lake Okeechobee News
OKEECHOBEE — After a child complained of mistreatment by a school bus driver, his parents called the law.

According to the incident report, Deputy D. Peters of the Okeechobee County Sheriff’s Office, the school resource officer at Osceola Middle School, was met by the child’s parent at the school. The child was also there for the meeting.

The child said he was riding the bus home at the end of the school day on Sept. 8. He had a duck call, handmade by his uncle, with him. He said he blew into the duck call to show his friends how it worked. The child said the bus driver became angry, swore at the boy and snatched the duck call out of the boy’s hand, broke it in half and threw it in the trash. When the bus reached the boy’s stop, he tried to retrieve it from the trash can. The boy said he was holding a large musical instrument case, and the bus driver grabbed him by the arm and pushed him toward the exit, demanding he get off the bus. The boy said he was upset and scared, so he reported it to his parent.

The father said there were complaints of the driver nearly hitting other vehicles and brake-checking if the children were not listening. The man said his daughter had fallen in the aisle during one of those incidents.
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The deputy noted the duck call had no documented value as it was handmade. However, similar calls online were priced at $100.

The father said he wished to press charges.

The deputy checked the video surveillance and found the boy had used the call for approximately 12 minutes, apparently annoying some of the other children on the bus. The video shows the driver take the call and snap it in half.

The Department of Children and Families was notified of the incident.


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The report notes a warrant will be issued for the man’s arrest on charges of battery and criminal mischief.

Okeechobee County Assistant School Superintendent Dr. Joseph Stanley said, “Okeechobee County Schools does not condone the actions alleged in this incident. We expect all employees to exercise sound judgment and treat students and their property with respect. The individual involved is no longer employed by the district.”
 
Okeechobee News isn't even a satire website. This stuff is for real. It definitely reads like The Onion or something.

I do pay a yearly subscription to view it though. That's why I don't post links--because it's not available to the public.
 
Okeechobee News isn't even a satire website. This stuff is for real. It definitely reads like The Onion or something.

I do pay a yearly subscription to view it though. That's why I don't post links--because it's not available to the public.
Thanks for clearing up the subscription thing Mallard. I get hit with a paywall every stinkin time I try to read the new on that site. Annoying.

And thanks for pasting these since I can't read them organically
 

Woman reports adult toys stolen​

Posted Friday, September 18, 2026 4:07 pm
By Cathy Womble
Lake Okeechobee News
OKEECHOBEE — A Okeechobee County deputy was dispatched on a very unusual call regarding a possible theft. When Okeechobee County Sheriff’s Deputy Dalton Pitts arrived at the home on Northeast 12th Lane, he was met by a woman who said her ex stole a bag filled with very personal items.

According to the incident report, she told the deputy the missing items were adult toys and other similar things, including handcuffs, hogties, a whip, feathers, and many other similar items. She estimated the value of the missing items to be approximately $200.


lg.php

Based on the nature of the missing items, the deputy suggested the woman contact her ex and ask him to return them. However, the woman asked the deputy if he would call the man for her. Deputy Pitts called the man and was told the woman had already collected her personal items from his home, and he had not seen those particular things.

When the deputy spoke with the woman again, he told her the matter was civil in nature, and she would need to pursue the matter through civil processes.
LET'S GO RANDY!!!

The goods are in his garage
 

Guy playing with what he thought was an empty revolver kills gf. Gets another gun while his friend, who's on the phone with 911 at the time, tries to stop him from killing himself. The friend was not successful....

escalated.gif
I used to live a few blocks from there. That's a really quiet, family neighborhood. Very uncommon for that area to make the news for any reason. Sounds like this former human was a complete fucking idiot. This town is also small enough that I must have seen that chick around at some point.

Related, perhaps, I saw a soldier from the 11th Airborne leaving the grocery store the other day that gave me a great sad. Early 20's black chick who must have been about 5'5" and pushing 200lbs, waddling her way out to her car with hips that could take up 2 plane seats. I did my best to not stare, but I was appalled at what the fitness standards must be over there. I don't understand how she could possibly be in the airborne with a body like that. Anyway, young soldiers have always done stupid shit, but I do really wonder about their overall culture over there right now. Sad all around.
 
You go from $200.00 worth of whips, handcuffs and feathers, to an advertisement for Randy's Garage. 🤷‍♀️
All her stuff went straight up Randy's shitpipe

Does Randy know where they landed his ad? You gotta know Randy, Mallard
 
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