Crete's Corner

nubbynub76 said:
I don't think there's a person on earth I could be around 24/7. I realize I'm the problem and it's for my sanity and their physical well being. I just need my alone time.
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I'm an extremely introverted "alone time" person too and if I read my post without having spent that time with my wife and realizing that there is actually a person on earth that can eliminate that "alone time" need, I would react the same exact same way. I would think "there's no fuckin' way I could spend 24/7 with anyone" But sometimes you don't realize things about yourself until you've been in situations you've never experienced.
 
bconcrete said:
Jesus, life can get busy. Been running running running the past two days.

But we're back! And this busy ass week has me
thinking about peace. As adults, as providers, as men and women, lives can get hectic as hell and it's reeeeaaaalllll easy to get lost in the sauce.

So...Crete Thoughts #6:

What do you do to find your peace in the storm of life? I know a lot use substances, no judgement, but lets dig a little deeper than that... What do you do with the substances? Do you read a book, watch a show, play some videogames, sit in the dark, paint a picture and enjoy the silence, what are you actually DOING to find that peace in the storm, even if you're imbibing during that time???

Ive personally gone full sober (god it's boring) several months ago, just for the hell of it honestly, and my place of peace is working out. I'm currently spending about 15 hours a week exercising, and it's my place to let go of all the shit, focus, and do something for me that I can fully control. During that time nothing matters but what's in front of me. All of those demons whispering in my ear get to fuck off, work can fuck off, and I can just be. If I didn't have it, idk what I'd do, it lets me de-stress and just show up better for the people in my life.
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When I was 15, a girl put her hand on my back, recoiled and said "you're boney". That's when I started lifting weights. I was 6 ft, 155 lbs and I had no idea what I was doing. I just walked into my room, found the heaviest thing I could pick up, which happened to be my brothers guitar amps, and started lifting them. 27 years later it's still what I do 4-6 days a week. My entire garage is dedicated to it. I don't do drugs, I very rarely drink, I just throw weights around.
 
Sedulous said:
When I was 15, a girl put her hand on my back, recoiled and said "you're boney". That's when I started lifting weights. I was 6 ft, 155 lbs and I had no idea what I was doing. I just walked into my room, found the heaviest thing I could pick up, which happened to be my brothers guitar amps, and started lifting them. 27 years later it's still what I do 4-6 days a week. My entire garage is dedicated to it. I don't do drugs, I very rarely drink, I just throw weights around.
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You ever get that date?
 
Sedulous said:
When I was 15, a girl put her hand on my back, recoiled and said "you're boney". That's when I started lifting weights. I was 6 ft, 155 lbs and I had no idea what I was doing. I just walked into my room, found the heaviest thing I could pick up, which happened to be my brothers guitar amps, and started lifting them. 27 years later it's still what I do 4-6 days a week. My entire garage is dedicated to it. I don't do drugs, I very rarely drink, I just throw weights around.
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Wow. 27 years later you're tossing around guitar amps? Do you have various sizes and weights of them, and maybe like a cool rack to put them on so you can start with the Fender 50 and end with the Marshall 130?
 
ABB said:
Wow. 27 years later you're tossing around guitar amps? Do you have various sizes and weights of them, and maybe like a cool rack to put them on so you can start with the Fender 50 and end with the Marshall 130?
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1786649648067.png

^the garage
 
ABB said:
Wow. 27 years later you're tossing around guitar amps? Do you have various sizes and weights of them, and maybe like a cool rack to put them on so you can start with the Fender 50 and end with the Marshall 130?
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They take up a lot of space, are way more expensive than regular weights, and were a pain in the ASS to mount on a barbell but I will never abandon the way of the amp.
 
Sedulous said:
They take up a lot of space, are way more expensive than regular weights, and were a pain in the ASS to mount on a barbell but I will never abandon the way of the amp.
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You sure? These fucking weights are damn expensive now! $1.50/lb in my neck of the woods. Last time I was looking for a set of 40 dumbbells they were $60 each. Mrrr. I can probably find a decent amp for cheaper now than 2 dumbbells lol.
 
Sedulous said:
I'm an extremely introverted "alone time" person too and if I read my post without having spent that time with my wife and realizing that there is actually a person on earth that can eliminate that "alone time" need, I would react the same exact same way. I would think "there's no fuckin' way I could spend 24/7 with anyone" But sometimes you don't realize things about yourself until you've been in situations you've never experienced.
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That's it!!! I'm telling her tonight she's not the one because I can't be around her all the time and I'm packing my bags!!!
 
bconcrete said:
So, something I've felt since we have all moved over and gotten settled. Things are a bit stale. IDK why exactly, but it feels like in the other place we just had more of a stream of things to talk about, and now it's just more of like a stagnant pond. Nobody's fault, and it's not a bad thing necessarily, just the nature of the beast.

Be that as it may, I don't like it. I like the group, I don't like it feeling stale, and I don't like how a lot of the joking and conversation has turned off and it's been more griping and bitching and picking at each other. It's frankly kind of a drag. And I genuinely like (almost) all of you and don't want that to become our thing. Again, nobody's fault, just the nature of how these things go, but we are not a sewing circle of clucking hens.

So, this my personal attempt to get the stream of conversation flowing a bit more again. I'm going to make a concerted effort each day to post something that's on my mind. Maybe it's musings about my life. Maybe someone annoyed me and I'm going to go in on them. Maybe it'll be bulldog videos. Maybe I'll talk to myself for three days and call it quits. Who knows, it's all a mystery, but we're gonna at least try it and find out cuz I'm simply not the type to see something I don't like and not try and do something about it!

Anyone is of course free to do the same and bring anything you want to the table to discuss, this thread is meant to just go wherever and have people chatting.

PS: @Ruff Area Shot Caller eats an entire corn dog without biting it.
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love you bro...love the energy of this post, the entire vibe of it.

i have no clue what you reference, don't wanna know, don't wanna say none of the shit everybody THINKS i'mma say...only.

i miss you and errybody else's ugly mf faces.

cheers mayne. and fvck your face
 
FunnyHoneyBunny said:
Empathy
Keep in mind, i am weird, so i was never the "get the biggest job and the most money/bitches" kind of person.
If i was ever content with something, it usually would not change and therefore i would not want another position.
So what many people prefer in a job, i most of the time do not care about.

But empathy was always important to me.
The bosses i hated the most, were the ones, that were unable to project themselves in the position of other people.
Giving deadlines that are just impossible to keep up.
Being rude all the time, while complaining, why nobody likes to work here.
Putting up rules, they won't honor themselves, but claim everyone is equal.
Shit like that.

Obviously a boss can do whatever the fuck he wants, he is the boss.
But everybody can call in sick or look for another job as well.

EDIT.. i guess my falls under self awareness?
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bconcrete said:
Jesus, life can get busy. Been running running running the past two days.

But we're back! And this busy ass week has me
thinking about peace. As adults, as providers, as men and women, lives can get hectic as hell and it's reeeeaaaalllll easy to get lost in the sauce.

So...Crete Thoughts #6:

What do you do to find your peace in the storm of life? I know a lot use substances, no judgement, but lets dig a little deeper than that... What do you do with the substances? Do you read a book, watch a show, play some videogames, sit in the dark, paint a picture and enjoy the silence, what are you actually DOING to find that peace in the storm, even if you're imbibing during that time???

Ive personally gone full sober (god it's boring) several months ago, just for the hell of it honestly, and my place of peace is working out. I'm currently spending about 15 hours a week exercising, and it's my place to let go of all the shit, focus, and do something for me that I can fully control. During that time nothing matters but what's in front of me. All of those demons whispering in my ear get to fuck off, work can fuck off, and I can just be. If I didn't have it, idk what I'd do, it lets me de-stress and just show up better for the people in my life.
Click to expand...
see, it's hard for me to talk about some of this shit on here...because here WAS a source of peace, until it wasn't..and then i just come across as bitter, when i'm simply trying to be transparent....no dwayne wade....maybe some can relate, or understand, or clock what i'm sayin...maybe they can't....but this is just my response to the prompt....no emotions, no bad guys in my story... only catalysts and teachers. nuff said.

but, since that whole fiasco.... arte, and music, play a huge role. reading some analog books too. all while baked, of course.....funds make me go a few days to weeks here and there on the sober tip...and at first it was a bit un-fun...but honestly, i never really had substance additiction issues...moreso self love issues. cold turkey for anything has always been like an on/off switch for me. the second i wanted to love myself, as far as hard substances were concerned....it was done....until i had issues loving or respecting who i'd see peeking glances at me in the mirror....and felt those who i loved who ain't love me back were going about tearing me down all wrong, and i was gunna show them how to do that shit good n proper....when i do a thing, i do that thing quite well...sometimes too well.

but....heavy on the hills of torrance and PV rap-hands walks (some might remember....but i don't actually recite the lyrics, or rap along like a mf karaoke sesh....but i'mma rap hands the fvck outta some joints), bluetooth speaker bumping to the neighbors and coyotes the flavour of the week's offerings or my G'd out playlists....that's the most peace i find in the past few months. because of the genre and niche i listen to, there's almost always an album or three that released that week...PLUS just absorbing/digesting the previous week's choice cuts, the joints that make it past my filter and get added to the vault, they essentially my 'big homies' type conversations/impromptu therapy sessions at times as well...as most my real true people's done passed away - just lost another one a few months back, RIP my bro and 2x ex brother-in-law...BOXER BNx13... we always kept shit a buck, his sister and all that drama was secondary....when almost all my social contacts became hostile....i had to spend a lot of time with the person supposedly the source of all the issues....and i ain't have no issues with that mf, to be honest. he's a cool ass mf, in my book, we chill quite often...and i'm truely thankful for most those involved for forcing me to undergo that experience....even if i didn't really enjoy the way it all unfolded.

I also know social media is ghey and allat....but I feel it's all about how you use it. this is a form of social media...but it doesn't have the same stigma as say a FB, IG or X.com account.....but it should, full stop. this place is catty as hell, factions like whoa, and fickle as all shit. very short/selective memories, and willing to eat it's own without so much as a reason or explanation...or worse, unwillingness to go against the grain or rock the boat...and just 'watch' shit happen, that they might tell you in DM's how bad they feel...but you know, won't really say that same shit in the quad in full view of errybody type shit. and I know you've disagreed with me in the past on that assertion, but....some of the shit i seen you post in this thread leads me to believe you might be able to see where i get some of the rope to make such assertions. i don't make none of these remarks outta a place of aggreived resentment...simply a what is type honesty...or at least what I lived. and that's ok. but I say all of that to say... I use my IG strictly for music and arte follows, and correspondence....like I used this place for mma correspondence, and posting about music for those who might be hip hop fans...but find themselves detesting everything the 'industry' has to offer nowadays, and pines for a day when shit wasn't buttass....and don't wanna be 'that guy' who ONLY listens to the shit he grew up listening to....and for a while, i was seen as such and that was understood by apparently all....till it wasn't. but my IG experience is also a source of zen for me, i interact with music artists i respect and listen to, i get unreleased shit sent to me to get feedback on...i interact with some of my favourite graff artists, get 1of1 original arte sent to me just off the strength of being not a dick...it's mf glorious. i feel seen. i feel respected. and i ain't gotta do no flips, no performative chode licking in order to be seen for ME.

it's essentially how I felt here....before i ducked out.

i ain't have a goal with this post other than to dish on how a degen like me gets through the weeks n shit. surprised even myself, as i ain't put it in this way for myself until now. music, arte, friendship, appreciation, good stories - real or ficticious.... emails with softi through encrypted gang email format....such is life. but the areas i feel I lost....have left a few lingering areas where i feel i wanna make at least one more go at mending some fences that even if I don't feel i'm the one who damaged them shits...i at least show them shits mattered to me, and i'm willing to do more than my part to mend them...as long as it ain't all me doing all the mf work.
 
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nubbynub76 said:
Jk I would rub her hair or hug her and ask what is wrong. Sometimes people are just having a bad day and need kind words.
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see....this is where solid non-emotional times type conversations come into play...because not all mf's need, want or enjoy that type treatment.

i can GIVE that type of energy, if it's required....but I don't default into some shining knight when i see a mf all glum. unless I did that shit, and unless they tell me what the fvck is happening in my first, maaaaaybe 2nd attempt at a query - that's now obviously a 'THEY' problem....and i'mma be me in all ways and forms unless they speak the fvck up.

see...pizza bae ain't understand this shit....and wanted me to hercules her outta shit i ain't eeeen know she was going through...which i tried to inquire about, but only once or twice...but not thrice. or more.

if i'm pulling teeth to get to the issue...now we just playing mf stupid needy ass games. and i'm out.....time for you to


UzfLqu.gif
 
Loughe said:
see....this is where solid non-emotional times type conversations come into play...because not all mf's need, want or enjoy that type treatment.

i can GIVE that type of energy, if it's required....but I don't default into some shining knight when i see a mf all glum. unless I did that shit, and unless they tell me what the fvck is happening in my first, maaaaaybe 2nd attempt at a query - that's now obviously a 'THEY' problem....and i'mma be me in all ways and forms unless they speak the fvck up.

see...pizza bae ain't understand this shit....and wanted me to hercules her outta shit i ain't eeeen know she was going through...which i tried to inquire about, but only once or twice...but not thrice. or more.

if i'm pulling teeth to get to the issue...now we just playing mf stupid needy ass games. and i'm out.....time for you to


UzfLqu.gif
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Next adventure....an older heaux, librarian to be precise....i just wanna get her turnt and have her to tell me to STFU....skeeeeeetles
 
Loughe said:
see, it's hard for me to talk about some of this shit on here...because here WAS a source of peace, until it wasn't..and then i just come across as bitter, when i'm simply trying to be transparent....no dwayne wade....maybe some can relate, or understand, or clock what i'm sayin...maybe they can't....but this is just my response to the prompt....no emotions, no bad guys in my story... only catalysts and teachers. nuff said.

but, since that whole fiasco.... arte, and music, play a huge role. reading some analog books too. all while baked, of course.....funds make me go a few days to weeks here and there on the sober tip...and at first it was a bit un-fun...but honestly, i never really had substance additiction issues...moreso self love issues. cold turkey for anything has always been like an on/off switch for me. the second i wanted to love myself, as far as hard substances were concerned....it was done....until i had issues loving or respecting who i'd see peeking glances at me in the mirror....and felt those who i loved who ain't love me back were going about tearing me down all wrong, and i was gunna show them how to do that shit good n proper....when i do a thing, i do that thing quite well...sometimes too well.

but....heavy on the hills of torrance and PV rap-hands walks (some might remember....but i don't actually recite the lyrics, or rap along like a mf karaoke sesh....but i'mma rap hands the fvck outta some joints), bluetooth speaker bumping to the neighbors and coyotes the flavour of the week's offerings or my G'd out playlists....that's the most peace i find in the past few months. because of the genre and niche i listen to, there's almost always an album or three that released that week...PLUS just absorbing/digesting the previous week's choice cuts, the joints that make it past my filter and get added to the vault, they essentially my 'big homies' type conversations/impromptu therapy sessions at times as well...as most my real true people's done passed away - just lost another one a few months back, RIP my bro and 2x ex brother-in-law...BOXER BNx13... we always kept shit a buck, his sister and all that drama was secondary....when almost all my social contacts became hostile....i had to spend a lot of time with the person supposedly the source of all the issues....and i ain't have no issues with that mf, to be honest. he's a cool ass mf, in my book, we chill quite often...and i'm truely thankful for most those involved for forcing me to undergo that experience....even if i didn't really enjoy the way it all unfolded.

I also know social media is ghey and allat....but I feel it's all about how you use it. this is a form of social media...but it doesn't have the same stigma as say a FB, IG or X.com account.....but it should, full stop. this place is catty as hell, factions like whoa, and fickle as all shit. very short/selective memories, and willing to eat it's own without so much as a reason or explanation...or worse, unwillingness to go against the grain or rock the boat...and just 'watch' shit happen, that they might tell you in DM's how bad they feel...but you know, won't really say that same shit in the quad in full view of errybody type shit. and I know you've disagreed with me in the past on that assertion, but....some of the shit i seen you post in this thread leads me to believe you might be able to see where i get some of the rope to make such assertions. i don't make none of these remarks outta a place of aggreived resentment...simply a what is type honesty...or at least what I lived. and that's ok. but I say all of that to say... I use my IG strictly for music and arte follows, and correspondence....like I used this place for mma correspondence, and posting about music for those who might be hip hop fans...but find themselves detesting everything the 'industry' has to offer nowadays, and pines for a day when shit wasn't buttass....and don't wanna be 'that guy' who ONLY listens to the shit he grew up listening to....and for a while, i was seen as such and that was understood by apparently all....till it wasn't. but my IG experience is also a source of zen for me, i interact with music artists i respect and listen to, i get unreleased shit sent to me to get feedback on...i interact with some of my favourite graff artists, get 1of1 original arte sent to me just off the strength of being not a dick...it's mf glorious. i feel seen. i feel respected. and i ain't gotta do no flips, no performative chode licking in order to be seen for ME.

it's essentially how I felt here....before i ducked out.

i ain't have a goal with this post other than to dish on how a degen like me gets through the weeks n shit. surprised even myself, as i ain't put it in this way for myself until now. music, arte, friendship, appreciation, good stories - real or ficticious.... emails with softi through encrypted gang email format....such is life. but the areas i feel I lost....have left a few lingering areas where i feel i wanna make at least one more go at mending some fences that even if I don't feel i'm the one who damaged them shits...i at least show them shits mattered to me, and i'm willing to do more than my part to mend them...as long as it ain't all me doing all the mf work.
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It's about time. I'm glad you're here!
 
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