Triple M Junkie Idol Game thread

bconcrete said:
Speaking of:

If anyone was wondering how my Friday was going, I just went upstairs to check on the dogs (they were suspiciously quiet), and found the bulldog was not in her usual spot on the recliner. This was very odd.

I call for her, she comes out from under the sink in the bathroom (it's where we keep towels, and its like a little nest area for her), and I can just tell she doesn't seem to be feeling well.

I'm concerned, this bulldog is my baby, so I sit down and start petting her. She gets into it, as dogs do, they get all wiggly and shit. Then she climbs up in my lap (bulldogs are very clingy). I pet her for a bit, then I stop, she just does that wiggle dogs do when they want you to keep petting them ... And then she proceeds to turn her head and vomit out this vile shit sludge of half digested fucking feces all over my bare fucking leg, because, of course, I'm wearing my fucking basketball shorts.

We both just stared at each other in horrified silence for a second until she ran into her kennel, leaving me and my leg sitting there in a small puddle of shitpuke and the newest addition to my PTSD library.

She seems to be feeling much better tho, so I won't have a vet bill. Got that going for me at least. Yippee.
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You and ABBs just tryna make everyone sick today, is that it?

I will say, it's crazy how small to medium sized dogs will only throw up when they are on a lap, or a piece of furniture. They will jump up off the easy-to-clean wood beforehand every time.
 
bconcrete said:
Speaking of:

If anyone was wondering how my Friday was going, I just went upstairs to check on the dogs (they were suspiciously quiet), and found the bulldog was not in her usual spot on the recliner. This was very odd.

I call for her, she comes out from under the sink in the bathroom (it's where we keep towels, and its like a little nest area for her), and I can just tell she doesn't seem to be feeling well.

I'm concerned, this bulldog is my baby, so I sit down and start petting her. She gets into it, as dogs do, they get all wiggly and shit. Then she climbs up in my lap (bulldogs are very clingy). I pet her for a bit, then I stop, she just does that wiggle dogs do when they want you to keep petting them ... And then she proceeds to turn her head and vomit out this vile shit sludge of half digested fucking feces all over my bare fucking leg, because, of course, I'm wearing my fucking basketball shorts.

We both just stared at each other in horrified silence for a second until she ran into her kennel, leaving me and my leg sitting there in a small puddle of shitpuke and the newest addition to my PTSD library.

She seems to be feeling much better tho, so I won't have a vet bill. Got that going for me at least. Yippee.
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That story ended up much better than I feared it would
 
bconcrete said:
Speaking of:

If anyone was wondering how my Friday was going, I just went upstairs to check on the dogs (they were suspiciously quiet), and found the bulldog was not in her usual spot on the recliner. This was very odd.

I call for her, she comes out from under the sink in the bathroom (it's where we keep towels, and its like a little nest area for her), and I can just tell she doesn't seem to be feeling well.

I'm concerned, this bulldog is my baby, so I sit down and start petting her. She gets into it, as dogs do, they get all wiggly and shit. Then she climbs up in my lap (bulldogs are very clingy). I pet her for a bit, then I stop, she just does that wiggle dogs do when they want you to keep petting them ... And then she proceeds to turn her head and vomit out this vile shit sludge of half digested fucking feces all over my bare fucking leg, because, of course, I'm wearing my fucking basketball shorts.

We both just stared at each other in horrified silence for a second until she ran into her kennel, leaving me and my leg sitting there in a small puddle of shitpuke and the newest addition to my PTSD library.

She seems to be feeling much better tho, so I won't have a vet bill. Got that going for me at least. Yippee.
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I shouldn't laugh but man...
 
webble said:
Me too although still didn't end well.

I can go from asleep to awake in seconds when I hear that noise cats make before they puke
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I can be out of bed, with the nearest disposable paper like object in my hand, ready to catch a hairball in fractions of a second upon hearing that retching sound. This all happens before I'm even aware of what is happening. Decades of cat life has honed this sense that is probably sharper than my own self preservation.
 
Nastycrow said:
Wait! What? Crete got puked on with shit vomit! What more can you ask for in terms of comedy. I could write a 3 seasons sitcom just with that premise.
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I read it and I get it. I immediately thought of a submission. But then read further and need a scene with music (that the judges like). Fuck that shit.
 
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